Rubbish Rain

Jared and I planned to take it easy this past weekend because the Elephant Rock is this Sunday (June 1). Saturday, the plan was to give our bikes a good ol’ fashion rub down.


Also, because I fecked up my handlebars from the spill two weekends ago, I had to re-tape my handle bars. No worries. “We’ll just watch a video” we said.

Re-tape Handle Bars

It was actually easier than I expected. I followed the British guy and slowly wrapped the sucker. I decided on black because white gets too dirty too fast.

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We thought I looked like a seamstress with the tape around my neck. It took about 10 minutes or so. I think it took us longer at the shop for me to decide on a color. Also, I wanted to try on one of those cycling caps. I looked ridiculous, as I imagined.

So, our bikes were lookin’ real good.

Sunday rolls around and we get to riding about 10 or so. It’s cloudy, which is always welcomed, and we’re biking along in to Golden. We decided on about 50 or so miles (ended up at 69) and took a break about 23 miles in under a canopy. As we sit there and drink our starch drink things, the sidewalk starts to get wet, big drops of rain falling. The rain gets faster.

We decided we’d sit it out. I didn’t think the storm would hang out for an hour and a half. It did. I guess it gave Jared and I good talking time, which we talk, but mostly it’s “break!” “On your left!” “Fuckin’ cars!” “Left here.” I had shit to do at night though, so, we had to get on the road.

The rain really cooled the air and I regretted not having pants and a jacket.


We watched the clouds and I attempted to guess where the wind was coming from. I tried looking at the billowing trees, but, really, the leaves and branches were flipping every which way. We decided we’d just keep going. Jared said we’ll ride toward the blue sky.

That didn’t last long as the storm caught up with us. I swear, it just circled us. We rode along the Clear Creek path (which was pretty) on to the Platte River Trail. We were on there for about ten minutes, then hail started pouring down. We pulled over and huddled beneath a tree. Lightning strikes run in my family, so I was really praying to Zeus not to strike me down. I wished the hail away and by some miracle, it actually started slowing down and came to a stop.

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I think Jared and I spent roughly two hours or so waiting out this bullshit storm. My gears were all yucky again, we were both covered in mud, and my bike did NOT look like I washed and polished it the day before. Then I felt a drag. I kept trying to look down at my tires and up at Jared, careful not to run into him. He flew up ahead of me while I tried to slow down.

A flat. I thought I’d be the lucky one, never getting a flat. Nope. Definitely not this weekend. No such thing as “Luck of the Irish.” I had to call out to Jared to stop. We did a quick change and were back on the road. I couldn’t drop my gears down because they were covered in mud and the like. I was pissed. We had to take up a pretty tough incline on the way back, and not being able to drop to the lowest (easiest) gear really sucked. I had to keep thinking Wonder Woman.


Here’s an updated picture of the ol’ knee. It’s slowly healing, in case you were wondering.

Saturday was also rubbish. Jared couldn’t wait for me to start riding, so I think he got about 30 or so miles in before we met up. We weren’t even two miles into the ride and my back tire was flat again! Sons of bitches. I had done what Jared said to do: I emptied the nitrogen out my tire and pumped it up with “regular” air. The sucker was flat though. Again, we pulled over, changed it really quick, and got back on our way. I wasn’t in the mood to ride Monday, I’ll be honest.

I was already putting out the bad vibes I just kept receiving the negative. We rode about five miles and the damn tire was running out of air again. We had to change it. I didn’t know if it was the actual tube or if there was something inside the tire rubbing it the wrong way..or what.

The ride was fairly easy as it was only 30-something miles, but we came across three, THREE snakes. One was huge and crossing the path. I was shaking after I passed it. Ain’t nobody got time for that.

I had cleaned off my bike in the morning and took it for a quick spin to see if the gears were working again, and thankfully, they were. I was able to climb up the steep stuff with no problems (a little huffing and puffing here and there).

I mean, if we can handle rain, thunder, lightning, hail, flooded paths, three flats, AND feckin’ snakes, I think we’re ready for Elephant Rock.

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I talk to myself out loud.

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